You consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping the food will swim by.

You hope it gets colder so the early ice will thicken up enough to drive your truck on it.

You keep the snow tires on your truck all year because it isn't worth taking them off for only two months.

You are smart enough to know that plunging your boots deep into the snow actually makes your feet WARMER when it is bitching cold out.

You believe that people rushing out on the lakes with their pickups in November is nature's way of upgrading the state's gene pool.

You are proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation.

You think a basketball team consists of twelve white boys.

You go to a high school basketball game, the score is 12-8 at half time, and you don't think there's anything strange about that (see above).

You like to come in out of the sun when the temperature gets above 72.

Your Dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead.

You believe that REAL vehicles have skis in front and a loud motor under your seat.

You like the Winter Olympics better than the Summer Olympics.

You have ever worn shorts and a parka at the same time.

Your town has an equal number of bars and churches.

You have ever had an entire telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number.

You know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedi, and Shakopee.

You consider Lime Jell-O a highly versatile food: a breakfast dish when it's filled with fruit, a salad when it has shredded carrots and a dab of mayonnaise, and a dessert when topped with Cool Whip.

You have kicked someone's ass for quoting dialogue from the movie "Fargo" to you.

You always believed that vacation meant "going up north."

Your town has an annual festival honoring a fish, fruit, vegetable, or ethnic food.

You know where the "Iron Range" is. Worse yet, you have BEEN there.

You thought "Grumpy Old Men" was a documentary.

You thank God every morning for not making you an Iowan, Wisconsinite or North Dakotan.

You believe that bitter cold, a slippery surface and speed go together in both sport and on the Interstate.

Every time you see moonlight on a lake you think of a dancing bear, and sing, gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters....Hamm's, the beer refreshing, Hamm's the beer refreshing."

You think that 20 below is cool, 40 below is getting cold, and 60 below is fine as long there is no windchill.

When people ask what you do in Minnesota in the summer, you reply, "Well, if it falls on the weekend we go to the lake."

You always make sure you have a can of cream of something soup in the cupboard just in case you need to make a hot dish for the church potluck.

Top 10 Good things about a Minnesota winter!

10. There are no mosquitoes.

9. You are so busy worrying about your car not starting, you don't have time to worry about anything else.

8. All the sissies leave for Florida.

7. If you carelessly leave meat in your car, it will freeze and stay fresh.

6. It's not as bad as a Manitoba winter.

5. There's the thrill of skiing downhill or unexpectedly being totally out of control as your car slides down an icy road.

4. Bundled up as they are, kids can fall down three flights of stairs and not get hurt.

3. There's ice fishing in a -50 degree wind chill, knowing that someone somewhere is flabbergasted at how hearty we are.

2. Anything is better than a humid Minnesota summer.

1. Knowing that the rest of the country is looking at us in total amazement, saying, "Why in the world do they stay there?"