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Border Crossing Realities
May 1, 2010

If you cross the North Korean border illegally you get 12 years of hard labor. (Unless Al Gore is your friend and boss...)

If you cross the Iranian border illegally you get detained indefinitely.

If you cross the Afghan border illegally you get shot.

If you cross the Saudi Arabian border illegally you get imprisoned immediately and cannot consult a lawyer.

If you cross the Chinese border illegally you may never be heard from again.

If you cross the Venezuelan border illegally you get branded as a spy and are rarely ever released.

If you cross the Cuban border illegally you get thrown into a political prison and are rarely released.

If you cross the U.S. border illegally you get:

  1. A job
  2. A driver's license
  3. A Social Security card
  4. Welfare
  5. Federal Food Stamps
  6. Credit Cards
  7. Subsidized rent or a low-interest load to buy a house
  8. Free public education
  9. Free health care
  10. An army of lobbyists in Washington D.C. to represent you
  11. Billions of dollars worth of public and legal documents printed in your language
  12. The right to carry your home country's flag while you publicly protest that you don't receive enough respect.


Just making sure everyone has a firm grasp on the situation...



Special thanks to Noah for sending me this gem...


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